Disclaimer: I Find Complaining Cathartic

So, being a student, especially a student of history, it is my responsibility to read lots and lots of historically relevant texts for class. Sometimes these are really interesting (check out Jeanne de Jussie's "The Short Chronicle"). Some of these are, unfortunately, extremely boring (at least to me; I find Polunov's "Russia in the Nineteenth Century" dry as a bone).

Most unfortunately, however, some of these books are extremely depressing, however well-written they are. Primo Levi's "Survival in Auschwitz", Anna Seghers' "The Seventh Cross" and Graham Swift's postmodernist novel "Waterland" are all, frankly, a drag; and I'm reading all three of them at the same time. In fact, I should really have finished Seghers and Levi, since I have a relatively short essay due on the pair tomorrow.

Instead I'm 100+ pages short of the finish in Seghers' novel and about the same amount in Levi's (which is sad really, because Levi's book is only 172 pages long!). What this should tell me is to stop procrastinating.

What it does tell me is that, for all my ranting and raving (don't worry, it's upcoming) about feminism, women's rights, liberation and whatnot, I am quite nearly pathetic in my preference for fluffy novels. Give me a book by Mercedes Lackey or Christine Feehan. Give me a book by Robin McKinley (admittedly, "Deerskin" is about as fluffy as broken glass), Sharon Shinn, Kelly McCullough. Argh! I want something with romance and a happy ending, not books of human pain and suffering.

This is so un-sexy. Oh well. I feel as sexy as an elephant, between the need for chocolate, my depressed mood (due 90% to these books I do assure you; the rest is general stress-related at the moment) and the realization that yes, I really should lose weight. I've switched from excessive sugar in my coffee to stevia; that's a good start, right?

Time to read another 100 pages of Levi and maybe bullshit a little on the Seghers book; I'm not sure I can take another 200 pages of sadness and desperation.